Roast My Channel
SparkLine's AI reads your YouTube channel like a tough-love coach — then delivers a brutally honest critique with real, actionable advice on what's holding you back.
What you'll get
Retention hook analysis
How well your titles, thumbnails, and first 30 seconds grab and keep viewers.
Upload cadence critique
Whether your posting frequency is helping or hurting algorithm momentum.
Thumbnail strategy
Pattern consistency, click-bait vs. substance balance, and visual brand cohesion.
Growth trajectory assessment
Sub growth rate, view-to-sub ratio, and the one thing most likely to unlock your next milestone.
Channel name anonymised
"Your upload schedule has the consistency of a weather app in spring — three videos in one week, then radio silence for a month. The algorithm doesn't reward bursty creators; it rewards reliable ones. Your thumbnails are solid individually, but they look like three different channels collided. Pick a font. Pick a color. Own it. The good news? Your average view duration sits above 55%, which means your content is genuinely compelling once people click. The problem is nobody's clicking. Fix your titles first — every recent one buries the hook in the middle. Lead with the reason to watch."